Working for money, working for love.

So I'm from the working class and one thing I know about the working class is - they work. Not that I'm not lazy, I am; but I know in the cells of my body that idleness is wrong, just wrong. It is this conditioning that has shaped many of my life choices and defined success for me. So how do I put those culturally conditioned responses, those culturally rewarded responses, to rest so I can enjoy the present moment?

And further, how can I engage my creative self, my authentic self, in the work that makes me joyful and filled with energy?

These were the issues I recently led a workshop around and together we made some astounding discoveries. One is that the problem is occurring for many of us as we connect our hearts and our wills. That connection is under attack because the culture in which we live has a "will" for our lives that differs from our personal will. One thing is clear to me, work is work but work that is a pleasure serves everyone better. The level of pleasure and passion we have in the efforts in which we spend our lives matters.

I struggle with that last sentence as I face returning to my day job. Not because it's not true but because it is and nothing I can manufacture is a big enough excuse for living any other way. Because the situation is at a crisis level on this planet, in this country, in our local food chains, in the way we identify ourselves and reward ourselves; so some of us are going to be in a process of sorting and re-arranging priorities. I include myself in this group.

There has been a planetary shift and things are going to change for many of us in the next 6 months I suspect. It is necessary. It is exciting.

Why the 4th this year?

Last night the revelers were warming up. Even though fireworks are illegal in Massachusetts they continually popped. It seems wrong somehow to be simulating "bombs bursting in air" when there are bombs tearing apart the bodies of people, both American and Iraqi and Afghani, daily. I question how removed we all are from the war we are waging if we can celebrate in this way. It is unconscious and unconsidered behavior.

I, for one, am shamed by this war, this mindlessness, this inability to understand even the basics of cause and effect. I am ashamed of us and what we are doing in our stupidity. And try as I can I cannot remove myself from the title of perpetrator. I am benefitting daily from the economy being propped up by military spending. None of us, no matter how much we are against this government and this war, can be held blameless for it. It is a hard and painful realization. Happy 4th of July.

© Angela Magara 2008

back from California

Taking a red-eye back from the redwoods is always a shift in consciousness and this trip was no exception. I sat, watching without sound, as the events of a week of news slid across the tiny tv screen provided for my in flight entertainment. Nothing really stuck, nothing seemed to really be as real as the firelight and songs echoing inside a grove of towering trees.

This week a group of us investigated our relationship with Earth, with the fey, and with our ancient alliances to support life. It seems that ourside that circle the world continued to move forward without thought of the consequences; or perhaps more accurately, without time to evaluate the effects of any one action. And that is even a thoughtless generalization. It might be most accurate to say that the media available on in-flight tv would persuade me that no one is taking the time to consider either actions or decisions or results.

I wonder if collective information has finally reached a point where it cannot reveal the combined actions of such a vast population. Perhaps the vessel of mainstream media is no longer large enough or complex enough to describe accurately the thinking, the motivations, and the values of such a diverse and multi-directed population. Perhaps, the problem is only partially the result of corporate manipulation. Possibly, there isn't a large enough container to hold our collective complexity of thought.

But one thing I know, the beings, seen and unseen, that are our partners in the dance of change are not on the news. I'm not on the news and all the magic and art and love that surround my life aren't making any headlines. That doesn't negate their, or my, effect. So I sit at a blog, along with many others, singing out that change is happening now.

We must not despair at our invisibility but continue to do, to trust, to act, to love. Each of us is having an effect with each decision we make, each purchase we complete, each time we choose the love of life over the acceptance of lifelessness. Death will come but now we live and the celebration of that is essential. It is essential for continuation and survival.

© Angela Magara 2008